Our second wedding (19 September 2007)

It has already been a month since our “second wedding” in Croatia, and I feel it’s high time for an exhaustive report of the trip and the festivities.

Elray and I departed for Croatia on August 10 from Bujumbura. Our flight was leaving at 3:45 pm and we got to the airport a couple of hours earlier. But, fate would not have it that way. It was at 3:45 pm that we got word, and I mean word of mouth, not an official announcement, that our flight was going to be late. Then, at 5 pm I asked one of the Ethiopian
Airlines agents when we were expected to take off, to which he replied: At 5:45. Never mind that the plane hadn’t yet arrived from Addis Ababa. Then, sometimes after 6 or so, I asked him again the same question and his reply was that the plane had just left Addis and was expected in Bujumbura after 7:30 or so. The whole time we were located in the passenger waiting area
with no shops, newspaper kiosks, uncomfortable seats, but one bar. At 8:30 or so, we finally took off. We were quite afraid we would miss our connecting flight to Rome, and we would have done so had the plane not waited for connecting passengers, like us, from the Bujumbura flight.

We boarded the plane to Rome at 2 am and took off around 3, arriving to Rome at 7 or so in the morning. Our next flight, to Split, was not until 12:30 so we had plenty of time to kill at the disorganized and not so nice Fiumicino Airport. The flight from Rome to Split is under an hour and it was exciting to fly over the calm Adriatic Sea and start seeing the offshore islands, including Solta where we were to hold our wedding, and finally the Croatian mainland. After clearing customs we emerged into the airport’s main hall where our friends from DC, Mark and Amanda, were waiting for us, having arrived on an earlier flight
from the U.S. The four of us took an airport bus to the city where we bought ferry tickets and got on the first ferry for Solta.

The trip to Solta takes only about 45 minutes. It was 5pm and the sun wasn’t too strong. We were all very tired having traveled all previous night. When the ferry docked, we were greeted by my father who took our luggage in his car and we took the mini-bus to the next town where our resort was located. It just so happens that my parents also bought a summerhouse in the same town. The town’s name is Necujam, a play on words from “ne cujem,” Croatian for “I can’t hear,” meaning this bay is very quiet.

The same evening, our friends Vincent and Paul, also from DC, Holly and Sarah (from the UK), and John and Katrine (from Norway) arrived to the island. More people came in a few days later: Ranya, Nora and Harry (Elray’s sister, niece and Ranya’s partner), Boris and Lene (Elray’s brother and his partner), Judith (Elray’s friend from Germany), Anja (my friend from
Split), and Marjan and Rick (from the U.S.). We spent our days at the beach, in and out of the water, laughing, eating, joking, and playing. Every evening, we would also go to my parents’ house, just 200 m away, where we enjoyed the sunset over the bay over a glass or two of good local wine, figs, and all sorts of other delicacies.

My parents loved having all of us close by, hearing our stories, sharing a few laughs and being part of the whole experience. One of the first two evenings they said to me that they had changed their mind and wanted to come with us to the reception the following week. My parents had fallen in love with Elray in June when we first visited them, and that love only grew more obvious on this trip. I was in heaven! They were also eager to meet Elray’s brother and sister, Boris and Ranya.

One of the first few days on the island we took a day trip to my hometown, Split, where we did sightseeing, shopping and had a wonderful meal in one of the small restaurants located within the walls of Diocletian’s palace, where Sarah tried to seduce a handsome but married waiter by telling him he was a “super frajer”—a super hunk. ;) (Forgive me, Sarah!)

Elray and I had chosen the location for our reception in June, as well as a mode of transportation for getting there: a boat. In fact, the ceremony was to take place on a boat. Then three days before the big day, the boat owner cancelled on us because he had gotten another (bigger) gig in the meantime. He did, however, give us a number for another boat company.
We met up with the owner and checked out his boat. It wasn’t exactly what we had in mind, but I was ready to
go with it. Luckily, Elray wouldn’t settle for anything less than perfect and the owner felt compelled to show us another boat of his. This was the boat we chose!

Our ceremony and celebration took place on August 16, just a day shy of one year since Elray proposed! The boat arrived to Necujam around 7 pm. All the guests and we gathered at the dock and got on the boat. The bottom level of the boat had a glass bottom, so we could see the sea beneath us. The top level was one big open platform, with chairs. We had asked Ranya,
Elray’s sister, to officiate the ceremony for us. Ranya was the first one to go upstairs, burn some sage to clear the energy, and prepare herself for the ceremony. All the guests followed, while Elray and I waiting on the bottom. The music started. It was a
beautiful, new-age song about giving and receiving set to the sound of hypnotizing drums that sounded like
water drops. All the guests got in two concentric circles on the upper level, moving in opposite directions. Elray and I made our way up and entered the middle of the inner circle. We were all moving, looking at each other, smiling, crying, and partook in this heart dance as the boat sailed towards the sunset.

Following the heart dance, guests sat down facing the front of the boat where Ranya was facing them. Alongside Ranya were our best men: John and Marjan, and in front of the three of them the two grooms. It is hard to describe the ceremony given that we were both transported to a very sacred and magical place. As Ranya performed the ceremony, as we exchanged our
rings again, as Elray sang to me and I recited a poem/vow to him, and as Ranya bestowed blessing upon each of us individually and us as a couple, the bright orange sun towards which we were sailing was just starting to merge with the sea, enveloping us in a warm halo. We like to think it was the universe nodding in approval of our love and blessing us with
beauty and protection.

After the ceremony ended, and after all the wonderful hugs and kisses from our dear friends and family, there was still half an hour remaining before we reached the other side of the island. As we enjoyed the scenery, drank wine and were plain being happy, the boat turned into the small village of Maslinica, revealing to our guest for the first time the beautifully lit and majestic 17th century Venetian castle of Martinis Marchi that was the site of our reception.

We docked and walked around the waterfront to the castle, where my parents and a local friend of mine were waiting for us as they had arrived by car. After a photo session in the castle’s gardens we descended to the wine cellar where under vaulted ceilings a long white table was set for our reception. As guests entered the room they each lit a tea light and placed
it on the table, forming a heart. The guests’ names were written on pebbles and placed around the table. The evening was magical. Delicious and succulent food was served and wine flowed freely, only to be interspersed by thoughtful and moving toasts by our best men, family and friends. Vincent and Paul performed a beautiful and delicate hula dance to a Hawaiian song about love. We were very honored by their performance and I personally was reminded of my four years in Hawaii. My parents were deeply moved that evening. Unable to speak because of the emotions that overcame them, they asked a friend of mine to say a few words in English. They were especially touched by Ranya’s remarks about marriage symbolizing peace between two families.

At midnight, we boarded the boat again and started our return to Necujam. Sitting on the upper level of the boat under the star-studded sky, we were privy to the most spectacular shooting-star display any of us had ever seen. Another gift from the universe!

We had another couple of days left on the island and enjoyed them with gusto, even as we had to say goodbye to our friends again. Elray and I spent the last night at my parents’ house and on Saturday morning took the ferry back to Split where we had to catch our plane to Rome. On the boat, as we sat in a shady corner, seven beautiful young women sat around us, took out a guitar and sang the most beautiful songs about the sea, their voices harmonizing. We were both moved to tears.

Once in Rome, we had 8 hours of layover and so we decided that time would be better spent by going into the city than sitting at the airport. We took a sightseeing bus tour, had dinner in a secluded tavern, and returned to the airport late into the night to board our plane.

We are so grateful to have been able to celebrate our love in this way. We are grateful for our wonderful friends and family who were there to support us. We are grateful to the universe for having brought us together.